Quite recently. a family court Judge ruled that it was not the responsibility of grand parents to look after their grand children and all that is expected of them is love and affection.
There are several cases of grand parents across the country who are burdened with the responsibility of looking after their grand children despite the parents being physically able to do so. Working parents often tend to pass on this responsibility to the older generation, showing complete indifference to their need for rest and freedom.
In most cases, the grandparents are saddled with this 24/7 baby sitting and lose out on their own years of retirement and relaxation. Tragically, most of them eventually end up suffering from medical complications, ranging from stress to orthopaedic injuries, tending to small children.
Here is what Pune’s parents had to say:
Kailash Agarwal, a Retired employee of a bank, says” I don’t feel that I am bound to the responsible for my grandchild. I like spending time with them, hence whenever possible, I encourage that.
But yes these days parents are pretty casual about their child’s upbringing. Usually, both parents are working and rely on us or maids to take care of them.
My son and his family stay in Mumbai. They visit us once or twice a month.
My grandchild is 5 years old and since both of them are working, a full-time maid take’s care of him.
This judgement is certainly very sensible. Not really in our case, but there are several others who are tied down to responsibilities even at this stage of life. Everybody must have the the right to decide on their life and how they spend it, he adds.”
” I left my job when I was expecting my child and resumed work only when she reached the age of 14. For me, parenting is really important, so I never relied on anybody for that, be it my parents or anyone else, says Swati Deshpande, a teacher by profession.
I would prefer not to work rather than asking someone to take care of my baby. I think grandparents have their own lives to lead and nobody should force them to take care of their grandchildren.
I also believe it is for the parents to work around their lives for their children and they shouldn’t depend on others for this.
Yedaba Kamle, Driver says,”I belong to a small village and there, we leave our kids to our parents and that’s not an obligation. They enjoy taking care of them and spending time with them.
There are times when my wife and I had to go out of station for some personal reasons, and in this case, we left our kids with them.
I think this kind of problem is more common in urban cities. Pune is better and has good family values.”
Anjum Khan, a housewife says, ” Actually, while I was expecting, I stayed at my mother’s place for a few months, so my parents took a lot of care of me and the baby.
They are so fond of him that they like spending time with him. There are times, they call up only to talk to him.
My In-laws do keep encouraging us to go out since they are there to take care of the child but we haven’t done that yet. I was a teacher and I left that to be with my baby.
Totally relying on parents usually happens in metropolitian cities where the grandparents are often forced to look after the children.
Enjoying one’s life has nothing to do with age, and grandparents also ought to be allowed that.
Sudesh Bhudrani, a Spanish teacher, says,” I think that it’s all about the bond you share with your parents.
Totally entrusting this responsibility and relying on them in wrong. If one is out for work or an urgent task, then yes leaving your child with your parents is always a safe option.”