When Things Turn Messy, Just Stay Calm And Listen

 

Constant fights in your relationship?, The only time you spend for each other is to fight? Nothing seems to make sense right?

Don’t worry, this is just a phase and you will move on quite quick! 

Pune365 spoke to a few young people to understand how they grapple with these tough periods in a relationship:

We are in a long-distance relationship, and we both have different schedules, therefore, it becomes difficult to devote any time for each other,” says Pratik Vyas, Celebrity Manager.

She is clingy so, It is impossible to be there for her every time. Without understanding or considering anything, she plays the blame game that invariably leads to more arguments.! My girlfriend becomes so defensive that you can barely have a conversation with her.

“It is vital to slow down and look at what is going wrong and understand your partners point of view before you react arbitrarily. If and when there is a genuine problem, it is important to understand where your partner is coming from on this matter.

Keeping an open mind and addressing their concerns before yours is essential.”

Good bonds are about giving and receiving and is important to be a good listener to keep it going well, adds Pratik.

“I am glad we went through a rough patch in our relationship, it actually made me a better person,” says Akshay Lad, Media professional.

After being in a four year relationship we did face difficult times and if there is anything that worked wonders in our relationship, it was communication!

“Avoiding the problem will only add fuel to the fire! In any relationship one has to be mature enough to talk about anything and everything. Else one partner thinks that there is no solution other than confrontation.

“Do not hold on to your ego for long, let it go ! At times, silence can also lead to major misunderstanding between the couple,” says Edward Fernandes, a Yoga instructor.

Talk to your partner about what hurt you without putting the entire blame on them, Forget your ego and initiate a conversation. It is important to speak out if anything is bothering you, and it is also fine to apologise even when it is not your fault.

“We often have arguments because i tend to forget things over these 8 years we’re dating.

And girls have this habit of recalling everything that happened for the first time, so we often get into arguments on how your boyfriend has forgotten our first kiss, first date, first coffee and so on…

Oh, Jesus, that is so much to remember, yet dinner at a new restaurant may help solve much everything,” he adds.

“I think going through a rough patch is normal and it helps in building a healthy relationship with your partner,” says Divya Dhamne, Makeup artist.

It is perfectly alright to fight, but don’t try to fix it immediately. Right after an argument, no one is prepared to understand or listen. All energy is spent only on proving who is right, so give it some time.

“Whenever I get into an argument with Adi, we both lose our temper. So, we just cool off and give each other personal space.  This has always helped us stay together…

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#All views expressed in this column are thude