“We’ve got to a stage where we’re completely comfortable being our awkward selves,” declare Vishal and Sruti Jaiswal who are looking forward to celebrating their 11th wedding anniversary on Republic Day.
This week we ask the Jaiswals and other Pune couples to share their secrets to wedded bliss.
Vishal pitches in on his wife’s observation explaining, “As the years roll by, time takes the pressure off wanting to be perfect for your partner. The occasional loud farts and bouts of nose-digging go unnoticed,” he snickers as his wife casts him a dark look.
Preeti Mittal and her beau Arnab give us another take on it. “When you’re married three years, you know it’s time to start being rude to your partner. He ain’t going anywhere,” she declares unabashed. Arnab is quick to step in with a diplomatic response.
Preeti is all about candour, but what my beautiful wife means is that you can take for granted that your spouse isn’t leaving you. This can be liberating in the best case scenario where you shed your skins and bare your souls to each other, without fear of any judgement.
Naren and Padmaja Borse who have enjoyed 38 years of matrimony together share their pearls of wisdom. “You must remember not to be all about yourself. A lot of these young couples forget that. They are all about me, my work, my habits, my dislikes. Ego must be left at the door when you cross the threshold with your partner,” says 61year-old Padmaja.
Naren watches on before adding, “The key is silence. Knowing when to remain silent and let your partner ramble on. Don’t get me wrong, this is not about being disrespectful or disregarding your partner.
Staying silent allows me to really pause and listen to her. That is when I realize how important the issue must be, for her to ramble on. That is when love conquers all and all is well again.
Vinod and Pranita Bhave talk of being married 24 years and share their golden rule.
The important part is never to forget to bicker. The absence of arguments heralds real trouble after a while.
“The more you fight, the more you are willing to voice your issues and talk them out. It is a fine way to avoid building up resentment against your partner,” chuckles Vinod.
“So bicker on Pune!” says Pranita.
#Respondent names changed to protect their individual privacy. All views expressed are those of the individual respondents.
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