Why Are Women Always Blamed For Not Keeping Secrets?

Women Gossiping
Image used for representation only.

‘Oh, Women love to gossip so they can never be trusted with a secret! ‘ 

So says the world, but, is keeping a secret really gender dependent? 

Pune365 posed these questions to a cross-section of men and women in Pune and here is what they had to say- 

Soham Mitra, Graphic designer says, “Women feel secrets are exclusive and it makes them feel super cool when they know something that others don’t.

”Moreover, 80 per cent of women don’t even believe that they are sharing secrets, according to them they’re just passing on information that others may not know.

All my female friends tell me stories about one another which they’re supposed to keep secret and end up saying “don’t tell her that I told you!” Mitra added.

We don’t gossip, we share things because we were taught sharing is caring, says Anamika Shaikh, MBA graduate.

I am not at all good with secrets, I get a weird feeling in my stomach when somebody tells me something that is to be kept a secret.

Recalling an incident, Anamika shares, My friend once told me about sneaking behind her boyfriend. Since am not good at keeping secrets, I mentioned this to another friend and the news went from one to another and finally reached her boyfriend! I didn’t intend to hurt her, but I believe am just the kind who can hold on to a secret, she added.

It depends on the secret and whom it is about. So if it is about the family, I tend to share it with my mom. If it is about friends, then my girlfriend gets to know, says Gauri Welankar, Blogger.

Most often, it is the men who share more secrets, be it about their girlfriends, or their passing affairs. They can’t keep their own secrets unlike women who are good with it!

I don’t think it is related to gender. In my opinion, both can keep secrets if they want too, says Abhishek Mishra, Software professional.

My best friend is a female and she is extremely good with keeping mine or anyone else’s secret.

Recalling his own experiences, Abhishek shares, I have hidden things from my girlfriend several times, be it a tinder date or a meeting with an ex-girlfriend. And my best friend knew it all, and so far she has kept it to herself.

Keeping secrets is not about a gender. It is just that people have formed their own perception that women can’t keep secrets. It is just a matter of reliability and trust, he added.

Divya Kanoja, Content Marketer says, I can’t agree more, Women are just not meant to be trusted with keeping a secret.

People have trusted me with their secrets in the past, but I have always failed them.

Women with more secrets get more attention. Most of the women including me, spill the secrets because it feels like a huge mental burden which you just need to get off your head, Divya added.


All views reflected in the article are of an individual (Some names are changed on request) and Pune365 don’t necessarily subscribe to it.

Ankita Malekar

Ankita Malekar

A talkative tiny speck in the world of Media, with an itch for travel and paws.
Ankita Malekar