Why A Fussy Foodie Won’t Fish For Obnoxious Fare

Red ant eggs served on a leaf. Image used for representation only

As I have said before, I am a confirmed foodie albeit a fussy one.

I am willing to go to a certain extent with the Food Obnoxious as I call it but have set strict limits around it.

I have earlier expounded in great detail about that white, loosely held together stuff called Curd and its watery friend Buttermilk which I simply hate. I have never had that foul stuff and will never have until my dying day.

But there are other things which I also do hate. I will fearlessly state these even at the expense of losing my reputation as a foodie.

I simply do not care. Accept me or reject me but I will not eat some of the food which I am going to touch upon.

I am not a great of fan of pork. I do eat it but in moderation and only in the best places I go to. It is not so much as the body of the pig but the head which is so repulsive. How on earth do people eat a pig’s head I wonder? Those ghastly faces with a snout and worse still the eyes. Yuck.

Yet, it is popular in the Philippines, Honduras, Cuba, the Caribbean and elsewhere. In fact it is the national dish of Puerto Rico.

They make it on Thanksgiving and Christmas. Well, they can go stuff themselves. They can gorge on the eyes as much as they want. But I will stay away.

And talking of eyes, have you ever looked into the eyes of a dead fish. Those lifeless orbs just stare back at you, all glassy and listless.

Now I know many humans who relish eating the eyes of a fish. I would have tried but a friend of my picked an eye on the fork, placed it right under my nose and continued discussing the merits and demerits of the Spanish Inquisition for about 10 minutes without popping it into her mouth. Ye Gods. That was a nightmare situation and it meant a permanent goodbye to the fish’s eye.

Then there is the case of the tongue. It is the thing which causes the most trouble in the world and in my case, I just can’t swallow it. I did try this so-called delicacy once, hidden in a sandwich. But it felt so chewy and horrible.

It was like one of those big fat bubble gums which you keep digging into without getting any further. So I have left the tongue to the politicians and opted for the edible parts. For all I care, they can blow bubbles with it.

Have you ever taken a slithery earthworm in your hands? Well, the feeling is not appealing at all. The same thing applies to the brain of animals. These whitish, longish things look slippery and snaky. It is supposed to be a delicacy of sorts, particularly when fried. But I don’t care.

I admit that what is weird for me does not apply to others. There are those who trip on ant’s eggs (they look like poppy seeds I have been told). In the Far East every crawling, swimming or walking thing except humans is eaten with relish.

Bon Appetit to these sadistic souls. They can stuff their faces with the crawlies as far as I care. Give me my wine and give me my fried fish – absolutely headless please.


Babu Kalyanpur

Babu Kalyanpur, ( Consulting Editor) has rich experience in both sports and business journalism. Babu has led news desks in Pune and Bahrain and writes extensively on his passion, sports and business besides current affairs and matters of importance to Pune.

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