Friends with Benefits and Other Games

Friends of Benefits

Relationships have long moved beyond the conventional girlfriend-boyfriend tags to include some interesting arrangements. From having a work-wife, playing relationship chicken or exploring the controversial friends with benefits deal- you name it, we have it.

Read on for these Puneites give you a fascinating insight into games people play.

“Relationships come with a fair deal of ambiguity today,” declares Rinisha K.R, a 24-year-old techie. “I had a crush on my co-worker and as our kinship deepened, he teased that I was his work-wife. Well, we had no policy against dating, but it never seemed to go beyond friendship, ‘officially’.

“The 4 am phone calls and occasional weekend getaways together did confuse me. That was until he abruptly announced one day that he was engaged and that ‘Our Arrangement’ had to end.

It was a messy situation to say the least, especially because we work together. I thought we were in a relationship, but clearly, he saw us as friends with benefits.”

This makes you wonder if the lines have gotten so murky that you’re in a relationship without knowing it?

“It does happen at times,” sheepishly admits Samvik Dani a 25-year-old mechanical engineer.

“When you develop feelings for a friend, there’s a game of relationship chicken. Neither wants to be the first to confess the feelings lest you should be turned down.

How long does the game of relationship chicken continue you ask? “Well, we’re waiting for the girl to confirm it, while slowing pushing the boundary beyond friendship,” Samvik explains.

“If she revolts or shuns us, then we quickly retreat. If not, well then that is the best situation imaginable, as there are no strings attached. All’s well without the bother of being in a relationship!” he grins.

Pooja Karde, a student of fine-arts also endorses friends with benefits. “I’ve been sort of seeing my male-friend for a year. He often suggests marriage, but I’m not convinced.

“I think it’s best we’re friends until we find someone better. Dating, movie marathons and cuddles are great fun because the intimacy is something you miss when you’re not in a relationship.

“So personally, I think friends with benefits is a great way to fill this void for a while,” asserts Pooja.

Shrouded in ambiguity with an uncertain future yet you can’t deny that such arrangements bring intriguing benefits to some. Whether you find it convenient or simply enjoy the intimacy, making sure both parties are on the same page at all times is a neat way to skirt heartbreak.

 

#Respondent names changed to protect privacy

#Views expressed in this column are the authors/respondents.

Aditi Balsaver