Why Didn’t I Realise How Tough Parenting Can Get?

Parenting Now
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Ask any parent you meet and they will have the stock answer coming your way…

Parenting is no cake walk and go there only when you are nice and ready to give and take it all !

Parenting is no longer just another responsibility. It requires much more than what you have fathomed and more so with the changing societal patterns.

There was a time when restrictions and control were the go-to methods for parents but today, it is all together a different story, say Pune’s parents…

Expressing her concerns for the safety of her kids, Shaileja Motwani, a business woman says, “With so many reported cases of rape, bullying and kidnapping, I prefer being strict with my kids, rather than making them prey in such perilous situations.

My strict rules and watchdog like behavior might bother my 8-year-old twins, but I am sure they will figure why all this was necessary.

“I feel parents being super lenient with their kids always end up in making a child ill-equipped and disorganised. The same parents later crib about how demanding and stubborn their kids have become,” adds Shaileja.

“When I was growing up, I thought my parents were the worst people on the planet. Although I was their only child, I wasn’t spared. I was beaten for every little thing I did,” says Kunal Parekh (26).

But I never had the audacity to argue with them, or ask them the reason for their behavior. It has been decades and I see my 4-year-old nephew asking my sister why she wasn’t scolded for dropping the utensil, unlike what he faces.

“These things might seem silly and worth a laugh, but it shows the changing dynamics between the parent child relationship.

Evidently, even parents cannot scold or beat their own child today, because the society and the laws interfere with their way of upbringing. In some situations, it might seem right, but not every time. The child shouldn’t be afraid of either one of his parents,” adds Kunal.

Growing up with strict parents has its own perks and perils. While parents think of a long list of rules, a child often comes up with his way of escaping it.

Stating this fact, Tina Ahuja (15) shares, “How much ever I want to own a cell phone or go partying with my friends, my stern dad comes up with far too many guidelines. At this day and age, who doesn’t own a basic cell phone, if not an expensive smart phone?

“My father works in Aurangabad and comes to Pune only twice a week, but when he is here, he doesn’t allow me to stay out past 8pm. So, I request my mother and plan my night outs on days when he is not here.

I know that he is concerned about my safety, but why is it that my friends can do everything, and I cannot, quips Tina.

“I think parenting has now grown to a whole new level of difficulty. The drill starts right from getting admissions in a primary school,” opines Mukesh Sharma (36).

“In this competitive environment, where a basic grade doesn’t get you anywhere, the stress of the parents reflects on the kids itself.

Parents try to give their kids the best of education, manners, etiquette, train them in extra-curricular activities. All this creates an artificial pressure on the child to excel in whatever he does.

“To balance all this, discipline is the key. The strict behavior of the parent is also misunderstood as too restrictive by the child, leading him to turn rebellious, or become an introvert.

“The best thing would be to keep calm and monitor the child rather than being authoritative and stubborn,” he adds.

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#All views expressed in this article are those of the individual respondents and Pune365 does not necessarily subscribe to them.

Loveleen Kaur

Loveleen Kaur

She loves travelling, dogs, sarcasm, humour and anything that spells F O O D, in that order. A writer on a journey to make positive stories a morning ritual and give society what it needs the most - optimism !!

Reach her at loveleen@pune365.com or tweet @KaurKaur18
Loveleen Kaur

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