Cold Thoughts About Sprayers

Sneezing - Cold Thoughts About Sprayers
Image used for representation only

 

I have often wondered why people say “God Bless You” when you do sneeze.

The answer is a bit tricky, I fear. Legend has it that when a person sneezes, his soul is thrown out of his body. To avoid an invasion by the Devil into it, the term was used.

It is used by reflex the moment somebody sneezes. But I have reservations about it.

With the Weather Gods playing fiddle while the seasons do the shake, the common cold has become probably the number one ailment. I have nothing against it per se. It is easy to tackle, with or without medication.

It is some the people who have it that bugs me. Am alright with sniffing but I hate The Sprayers.

The Sprayers are a common breed of humans who believe that if you have a cold, make sure the world and the planets know about.

Not only it should have a dramatic effect but should be accompanied by a spray of snot which would wet everything within the range including you. It is not a mere sprinkle mind you. It’s a loud achoooooooooooooo accompanied by a deluge.

It is that piece of showmanship which is supposed to gain sympathy from whosoever within range. Little do they know that those within vicinity may have other plans for them.

Here are some irritating things you face if you are not among those who believe in saying directly –

Wipe things around: Wipe things around you like the desk, computer and chair in front of the Sprayers. There is a one per cent chance the Sprayer may notice and take a hint. Usually they are thick-skinned otherwise why would they spray?

Ask a Question:  You can ask them – do you have a cold? The answer will be yes. But there won’t be any reaction on the spraying bit.

Tissue Box: Keep a tissue box in the vicinity. Two per cent chance they will use it.

Sharing a Meal: Never unless you are fond of a wet topping.

Coffee: Refuse – unless you like your coffee with a dash of extra light cream.

Shaking Hands:  Avoid at all costs. You may end up with wet hands and a quick infection.

Get Up Close and Personal: Sheer madness. Consult a psychiatrist for a sadistic streak.

Take  a Precautionary Pill: That’s playing Russian roulette.

Gift a Handkerchief: Waste of money. There will be every likelihood that it will be used as a face towel.

Walk Away: The easiest thing to do.  But you may not have the desired effect. The Sprayer does not take such hints. The positive side is you get some exercise by getting up and taking a walk frequently.

Revenge if You Get It: He sprays, you spray, everyone sprays and becomes part of a Happy Spraying Family.

 

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Babu Kalyanpur
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